Monday, December 11, 2006

Bah humbug. Usually Christmas is my favorite time of year. It is a time when a person like me can give, help, and show some concern for my fellow man, without people getting mad at me. A time when you spend with friends and family. Well this year it is only family for me (not that there is anything wrong with that, it just feels like the joy of the season has been cut in half).

I usually have a million ideas of what to give people. My cubicle is decorated, has goodies to overflowing, and Christmas music playing. At this time I have usually given out cards to all sorts of people, and left little gifts on everyone's cubicle. This time it is all dried up. No ideas on what to get anyone, not even family. I haven't decorated my cubicle, haven’t pulled out my music, and don't have any goodies anywhere. I haven't even given out any cards. I am not even sure if leaving a little gift on everyone's desk is ok, or if I will get written up for harassment from the one girl in my office. I would just leave her out, but then I may get in trouble for signaling her out.

This year Christmas, just serves as a reminder of how much I fucked everything up with my friends. How many "friends" turned there back on me, or just took advantage of my generosity. I know my birthday is coming up, yet I don't even want to go out for that.

Maybe things I will start getting into the spirit when the vacation kicks in.

One day at a time...


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